The Chronicles of Ragdick

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Ragnorak
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The Chronicles of Ragdick

#1 » Post by Ragnorak » 14 Apr 2015 05:23

After escaping the Stormwind Stockades, our hero Ragdick has been in hiding for the past 5 years, evading most of the Divinity and Inquisition goon squads that are set to capture him because of his high price on his horned head. His latest hideout is on the broken world of Draenor that is infested with Burning Legion casuals.

Ragdick escapes the notorious goon squad leader Blacklustersoldier, killing Blackluster's raid group and stealing his Invincible's Reins. He then heads to Grom' Gol in Stranglethorn Vale, after Blackluster reveals his bounty originated there. Once there Ragdick is reunited with Belendor, the pleb he rescued. Belendor believes Ragdick is a Tauren, a race of warriors long thought extinct, and wants to know about his home and if anyone other than himself is left. Belendor believes Booty Bay is the next town to be conquered by a mysterious force crusading across Azeroth. Virdo, a loot ninja, identifies the army as the Game Masters, religious fanatics who seek to mute everyone and ban those who refuse. The Game Masters invade that very night, overwhelming the defense forces and take control of Booty Bay. In the ensuing battle, Belendor is banned by Prodigy and Ragdick escapes.

The next day, the Game Masters senior muter called Slarmin coerces the populace into accepting widespread mutes, except for Ragdick, who defiantly bans the man who banned Belendor. Intrigued, the Lord Marshal Roel orders Ragdick be invisibly followed by the Moderators, half-dead keyboard turners, who determine that he is one of the few remaining Taurens. Lord Marshal Roel orders Ragdick's ban, but Ragdick escapes the Game Masters Island and allows himself to be recaptured by Blackluster. Ragdick is taken to Blackrock Mountain, a harsh subterranean prison, where Arockalypse, a girl Ragdick rescued, was reported to have been sent. He meets up with her as the prison warden, Etro, warns Blackluster of the "Mutehammer army" muting entire cities and leaving behind bugs. They have various ingame names but all seem to be aware of the threat they pose.

Once Ragdick escapes, the Lord Marshal Roel sends Commander Kindzadza to hunt him down, an easy process since Blackluster's multi-passenger flying mount left behind an easily traceable path. Kindzadza's wife, Nyeriah, speaks to Virdo, who reveals that Mulgore was devastated by the Lord Marshal Roel after he was told that a son of Mulgore would usurp his server ownership. Nyeriah and her husband determine Lord Marshal Roel wants Ragdick banned, as he may be the Tauren of that prophecy. In Blackrock Mountain, a disagreement breaks out between Blackluster and Etro over what Blackluster is owed. Word about the Game Masters has reached Etro, who deduces that Blackluster has stolen a prisoner from the Game Masters. Meanwhile, in the prison, Riddick finds Arockalypse, now named Arockafag, and they eventually reconcile.

Later, Etro's PTR Testers kill Blackluster's goon squads, take the reward gold and prepare to leave before the Game Masters arrive. Ragdick leads several captured plebs across the Burning Steppes' volcanic surface to reach the flightpath. The PTR Testers reach the flightpath, just as the captured plebs arrive outside of the camp to find the Game Masters have cornered them there. All of the PTR Testers are banned and Ragdick is stunlocked by Kindzadza. With the approach of the vicious core update Kindzadza leaves Ragdick to get roelbacked; Arock is then captured by the Game Masters.

However, Ragdick is saved by Slarmin, who tells him that if he stays away from the Game Master moderated chats, they will not hunt him. Slarmin then reveals that he too is Tauren, and that Kindzadza will report Ragdick as deleted, giving Ragdick the element of surprise. Slarmin then deletes himself by taking the full force of the core update getting roelbacked 50 years after he encourages Ragdick to save Arock and ban the Lord Marshal Roel. Meanwhile, Kindzadza reports Ragdick has been deleted and is named heir apparent by Lord Marshal Roel. Ragdick flies back to Booty Bay using Blackluster's mount.

Ragdick, disguised in Game Master robes, infiltrates GM Island; Nyeriah sees him, but encourages her husband not to warn Lord Marshal Roel, but rather to let Ragdick strike first to mute the Lord Marshal Roel and pave the way for Kindzadza to ban him and thus take his place as server owner. When Ragdick attacks, the Lord Marshal Roel presents Arock, who appears to have been muted. Ragdick 1v1's irl the Lord Marshal Roel in front of the staff team, who prevails with his GM hacks. When it appears that Ragdick is about to be banned, Arock strikes Lord Marshal Roel with the mutehammer. The Lord Marshal Roel turns around and instabans Arock. Kindzadza then makes his move to ban the muted Lord Marshal Roel but misses and ends up hitting Wilcox. Ragdick figures out Lord Marshal Roel's vulnerability and DDoS's him. With Lord Marshal Roel permabanned, the Game Masters kneel before Ragdick, who is now their new server owner.
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Wilcox
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#2 » Post by Wilcox » 14 Apr 2015 06:11

wdo is at your service

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holyaliva
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#3 » Post by holyaliva » 14 Apr 2015 06:38

"Kindzadza leaves Ragdick to get roelbacked"

man i love that word xD roelbacked
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SyntaxError
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#4 » Post by SyntaxError » 14 Apr 2015 08:42

An interesting... piece of literature. I see a lot of Chronicles of Riddick here (Oh, har har, now I see it)
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Wilcox
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#5 » Post by Wilcox » 14 Apr 2015 10:22

wilcox is immune to mute and ban btw.

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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#6 » Post by ItchyVortex » 14 Apr 2015 10:32

However, Ragdick is saved by Slarmin, who tells him that if he stays away from the Game Master moderated chats, they will not hunt him. Slarmin then reveals that he too is Tauren, and that Kindzadza will report Ragdick as deleted, giving Ragdick the element of surprise. Slarmin then deletes himself by taking the full force of the core update getting roelbacked 50 years
dank plot twist m8
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Roel
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#7 » Post by Roel » 14 Apr 2015 10:43

Really interesting, I don't know how you do it...

"Kindzadza's wife, Nyeriah"
I never got invited to the wedding party :shock:

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Kindzadza
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#8 » Post by Kindzadza » 14 Apr 2015 10:45

I wasn't too which is odd. ^_^

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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#9 » Post by Chasity » 14 Apr 2015 10:58

Roel wrote:Really interesting, I don't know how you do it...

"Kindzadza's wife, Nyeriah"
I never got invited to the wedding party :shock:
None of us was. I think it was a secret marriage :D
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Justicelight
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#10 » Post by Justicelight » 14 Apr 2015 10:59

They did it on the ship sailing on the water near Stormwind, holding each other like in Titanic.

[youtube]zmbw8OycJrE[/youtube]
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#11 » Post by Polkic » 14 Apr 2015 11:02

Roel wrote:Really interesting, I don't know how you do it...

"Kindzadza's wife, Nyeriah"
I never got invited to the wedding party :shock:
Her recent absence may explain this...
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Justicelight
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#12 » Post by Justicelight » 14 Apr 2015 11:04

Polkic wrote:Her recent absence may explain this...
Omg, they had a child too?
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"I write about the power of trying, because I want to be okay with failing. I write about generosity because I battle selfishness. I write about joy because I know sorrow. I write about faith because I almost lost mine, and I know what it is to be broken and in need of redemption. I write about gratitude because I am thankful - for all of it."

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alpakturk
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#13 » Post by alpakturk » 14 Apr 2015 11:07

ahahah, funny and beautiful, nice job ;)

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Myaoming
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#14 » Post by Myaoming » 14 Apr 2015 14:41

LOL that's awesome! "Game Masters senior muter Slarmin" OP title :D
Great story!
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Re: The Chronicles of Ragdick

#15 » Post by Vaxsysl » 15 May 2015 16:23

Nice text. Fartbuster's demise.
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